When I Couldn't Find the Words, I Turned to Music
This post is a little tender — about love, loss, and the dog I still miss every day. Music helped me express what words couldn’t, so I’m sharing a few of those songs here, too.
It’s been a few years since I lost my dog — the one who was somehow my best, worst, and favorite all at once. I could probably check the drawer where his little paw print is tucked away, memorialized in clay for the exact date he left us, but honestly? Even now, my body says NOPE. Feels like touching fire. Too much. Too soon. Still. So let’s just go with “a few years.”
He was a wanderer. The kind of dog who wasn’t big on staying put — more interested in meeting new dogs or pacing the fence. Nothing could lure him back inside until he was good and ready. Clif Bars, bacon, bones — none of it had any power over his strong will. He was my first standard poodle: smart, stubborn, ridiculous, and easy to love.
He came into my life right as I was saying goodbye to my elderly dog. That’s always been how I cope: one leaves, another joins the pack. It’s a cycle of heartbreak and love, rinse and repeat.
A lot of us have been through this. Something like 86 million families in the U.S. have a dog (American Pet Products Association, 2023). So if you’ve experienced pet loss, you already get it: it’s real grief. The kind that hits in the quiet moments. Routines you didn’t realize meant everything — until they were suddenly gone. Single trips to the bathroom. Lonely footsteps.
Writing about this still kind of knocks the wind out of me. Deep down, I’ve known I needed to face it — so I pulled out my favorite picture of him and designed a t-shirt in his honor. I tried to make it happy.
But whether the shirt is “good” or not doesn’t really matter. What matters is that I finally listened to the quiet voice I’d been ignoring: stop running, turn around, and look.
When I sat down to write this post, I realized that song lyrics might say what I couldn’t — and say it better:
🎵 “What I've felt, what I've known never shined through what I've shown…” – Metallica
🎵 “Lights will guide you home and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you.” – Coldplay
🎵 “Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, you were bigger than the whole sky.” – Taylor Swift
All song lyrics quoted are the property of their respective copyright owners. They are used here under fair use for commentary, emotional expression, and tribute. No commercial use is intended.
Whether your grief screams or just kind of sits next to you quietly, I hope something in this helped. For me, these lyrics aren’t just songs. They’re little reminders. Echoes. Scrapbook pieces of a love that still live somewhere in me.
If you’ve lost a pet, I see you. I’d love to hear about them if you want to share.
